what do I know about love

I am sitting at my desk right now, stirring around, and trying not to let my head get the best of me. For the most part I am able to work, and focus, and when a thought comes in my head, I do my best to replace it with a positive thought. I ask myself what do I know about love? I used to say that I wasnt very good at relationships, but I dont believe that to be true anymore. In fact, I think that I have a lot to offer in a relationship, but as with anyone I too come with a bit of complications, and challenges, and stuff otherwise known as baggage. What do I know about love? I know that it is what I've wanted my entire life. I know that it can be the best drug on earth? I know that it can lift spirits, make believers out of anyone, and love can perform miracles. I know that I have felt it, I know that I am in it right now. I know that with it, anything is possible. I also know that for me, when it comes to matters of the heart, I get very squirly. In the past, when someone starts to get close, when I let them in, and I am emotionally vulnerable I begin to lose myself in the face of fear. Fear of losing them. Fear of them not loving me. Fear of not being "good enough" For the longest time I didnt even realize this was taking place, because I wasnt aware of myself, and my truth enough to be able to recognize when these things were taking place, and felt justified in my thinking and resulting behavior. Today, I am doin something different. I am trying my fuckin damndest to do something different, and for the most part I am succesful, and becoming more so with each passing day. Here is what I know about love today. It is real. It is possible. It is not to be feared. Can I be hurt, yes, of course. But it is worth it. I can not let my fear dictate my behavior, my actions or my thoughts. I am starting to believe that I have something to offer. That I am in fact loveable. That I can and will be able to be in a healthy loving relationship. In order to do it, I will need to walk through these fears. Stare them down, face them, and move past them. I dont know that I've ever in my life felt so uncomfortable when it comes to this, but then again I dont know that I have ever let someone in so deep before. So what do I know about love? I know that it is worth it. That I will face my fears, I will walk through them, that I will over come them.