i havent cried

I was thinking about it this morning, and I realized I havent cried in a really long time. I wonder why that is. I cant even remember the last time I let go, and really let the water flow you know waht I mean? It has been over a year I think. I feel like there is something blocking me. I have hardened, froze that part of me or somethign. I wonder what it is going to take to unthaw it. I have cried a bit, and just when I think that it is going to come, something stops me and I tighten, and it doesnt come.